Medical Marijuana: Should it be Legal?

Introduction

The other day Dr. Oz hosted a debate on his show about Medical Marijuana and whether or not it should be legal for patients like talk show host Montel Williams who has been battling Multiple Sclerosis for over a decade. Also on his show was Dr. Andrea Barthwell and Dr. Donald Abrams who both supported two very different opinions on the subject of marijuana being used for medical purposes. The show had some heated moments from everyone including the audience so today I would like to take the time to try to lay down some perspective. Now right off the bat, before I say anything, I want to make one thing clear: I am not supporting the use of Marijuana. I myself do not smoke it, I never have, and probably never will. I am trying to discuss this subject without condoning or condemning because I see this as a basic human rights issue and would like to support basic reason and logic rather then irrationality. That said, I obviously have a side in this debate: I am all for the use of medical marijuana by those who have been evaluated by a doctor and who have reason to use the drug as a treatment rather then other “routine” prescription medications. I do not think that Marijuana should be legalized for recreational use nor do I support the recreational use of Marijuana in any way shape or form. There are so many different factors to look at from both sides of this debate so let's take it one topic at a time.

The Facts:

Marijuana can be used to relieve various symptoms that people with chronic illnesses such as AIDS, Multiple Sclerosis, and HIV may experience. There are in fact many other prescription medications that doctors can prescribe to patients to help relieve the same symptoms how ever, every patient is different and every patient reacts to different medications differently. Just as one prescription drug may work for me and not someone else Marijuana may work for one patient and not another. In this article I will be referring to Marijuana as a medication and I will also be looking at this subject from the perspective of a Multiple Sclerosis patient as I myself do have MS but I will also do my best to talk about the subject without bias.

The Debate: Pro Medical Marijuana

First lets start with the pro medical marijuana side. Patients may choose to try medical marijuana to relieve symptoms such as pain because other prescription medications either have not worked or cause more problems then they solve.

Again, this is on an individual basis and that is not an argument as to why Marijuana should not be used medically as all medications work on an individual basis. Vicodin does wonders for some people but after I had my Wisdom teeth removed, Vicodin did not do anything for me. So Right off the bat I have to say, if a medication does not work what do you do? You try something else. If that doesn't work what do you do? You once again try something else and if medical Marijuana happens to make your pain go away what's the problem?

The Debate: Against Medical Marijuana

After watching this episode of the Dr. Oz show I came up with a list of all the main reasons people against medical Marijuana seemed to be against the medication.

1- They Don't agree with the “smoking” of a medication.

2- They claim that where ever Marijuana is made legal crime rates and youth usage goes up.

3- They fear that patients will go around their doctors for medications.

4- Addiction.

5- They claim that marijuana is just as dangerous as cigarettes.

Now because I feel the people against the use of Marijuana have such a weak argument I am going to go ahead and throw in a sixth issue for them:

6- Marijuana is just as dangerous as drinking.

So, again, I am on the “Pro Medical Marijuana” side of this debate so allow me to tackle each of these issues one at a time.

Dr. Andrea Barthwell claimed that she could not support the “smoking of a medication” while Dr. Donald Abrams supported the idea that inhaling medication is nothing new, for example, asthma patients inhale their medication. Dr. Andrea Barthwell fought back concluding that inhaling a substance and burning a substance while breathing in it's smoke are two completely different things... Now forgive me if I come off a little sarcastic (for lack of better terms), but isn't the definition of inhaling “to breath something in”? I don't understand what the difference between breathing asthma medication in and breathing a medication's smoke in is... The only thing I can think of is the fact that the asthma medication is “naturally” in a gas form but Marijuana just requires one additional step to get the medication into your body via inhalation. According to pro medical marijuana debaters on the show, Marijuana does not increase the risks of pulmonary disease or cancer so for the sake of this debate we are going to have to check this one off as “It just makes me feel uncomfortable” for the people against medical Marijuana.

“Where ever Marijuana is made legal crime rates and youth usage goes up.” Now this one is a little more tricky because it is so sensitive to the "numbers" but I am still going to have to disagree here regardless of who the numbers support. The bottom line: If your concerned that your child is going to smoke Marijuana just because it has been made medically available to patients shouldn't you be more worried as to how they are getting this medical Marijuana and why they are hanging out with the people who are helping them get it? Shouldn't you be concerned as to why your child might not have their head screwed on just right making them open to the idea of drugs in the first place? Fact of the matter is, is that drug usage has nothing to do with the law, it has to do with a particular kind of person and their environment. Those kinds of people are going to experiment with what ever they have access to whether it's industrial cleaners or methane from cow manure. What ever they can get a hold of will become their “gateway” drug to the more serious drugs because that's the kind of person they are, the kind of person who wants to experiment. So legalizing the medical use of Marijuana really does not make any difference in a child's ability to gain access to the medication because they still have to find someone on the streets to get it from and they still have to be irresponsible enough to want to go out and find access to that medication. So as far as this one goes, I think it is up to parents to raise their kids in a way that will encourage them to have no desire to experiment with drugs, I believe that is the responsibility of a parent in the first place as children have much easier access to cigarets, alcohol, and cough medications.

“Fear that patients will go around their doctors for medications.”  
I find this next argument pretty funny... Dr. Andrea Barthwell worries that legalizing Medical Marijuana will cause patients to go behind their doctors backs and buy their medication from street vendors. I could go into detail on this one but lets keep it simple. Maybe there's a reason your patients are going behind your back for help, maybe it's because your not helping them. Simple solution: Be a better doctor. Moving on.

Addiction. 
According to Dr. Oz's research team, only one out of ten people become addicted to Marijuana. One out of ten... Now this is where a battle of numbers can come into play once again, a battle I do not wish to participate in because numbers can so easily become biased so I am going to try to keep this on a “common sense, look around and tell me what you see” kind of basis. As mentioned on the show tobacco is obviously more addictive then Marijuana and tobacco is legal. Alcohol is addictive and alcohol is legal. Pretty much every prescription medication prescribed for pain and many of the other common symptoms of diseases like Multiple Sclerosis is addictive. So why are people so concerned that patients will become addicted to medical Marijuana when so many people are constantly becoming addicted to Cigarettes, alcohol, and prescription medications? Might I add, cigarettes and alcohol are legal, addictive, and can't even help a person's health in any way shape or form, in fact, they both directly damage a person's health and once again, they are legal and they are ok. Prescription medications can help with certain symptoms but often cause additional side effects, something some people also may call damaging to one's health but so far that does not seem to be an issue. Medical Marijuana also can help relieve symptoms and may cause some side effects, way less then any prescription medication can cause, but yes, of course there are some possible side effects but if Marijuana can solve the same problems as some prescription medications without causing as many additional problems as prescription medications why is it not ok? I'm either once again going to have to check the “It just makes me uncomfortable” box for this one or the “Medical Marijuana will damage the profits of pharmaceutical companies” box. I will touch on that idea a bit more later on.

Speaking of tobacco, let's talk about the claim that smoking medical Marijuana is just as damaging as smoking a cigarette... Well... This one is so easy I don't even know where to start... So, medical Marijuana, something prescribed to make a problem go away is just as damaging as an item who's soul purpose is to cause problems while showing no evidence any kind of health benefits... Medical Marijuana has been proven to relieve various symptoms and even possibly reduce the risk of cancer while Cigarettes... Well... They just give you cancer. Simple logic already prove this accusation wrong... Sure, marijuana might have some negative side effects for some people but so do all prescription medications... Only difference is marijuana and prescription medications don't typically kill people where cigarettes do. I'm sorry but I just don't see the argument here, I really don't.

We touched on tobacco now lets touch on alcohol, a substance that is without a doubt much more abused then medical Marijuana especially among our youth. How often do you hear about an alcohol related car accident on the news? Often right? Now how often do you hear about car accidents that are a result of medical Marijuana?.. Have you ever heard of one? I haven’t. Now that's not to say it has never happened as I'm sure many people against medical Marijuana are saying right now but obviously it doesn't happen enough to make it to the news so in my opinion medical Marijuana is not anywhere near as large of a threat as alcohol. Medical Marijuana does not make people crazy like alcohol does so once again, why is alcohol ok but Medical Marijuana is not? Why is it acceptable for people to get drunk, act crazy, do stupid things, hurt and kill people but it's not ok for someone to feel “high” and relaxed? Again, we are checking the “It just makes me feel uncomfortable” box.

Criticism on the Debate

Like any other sensitive issue being debated among our nation right now you have two groups of people: One group who has concrete reasoning and evidence to support their opinion and another who has nothing but irrational accusations to defend theirs. Now I'm not trying to point finger and say who is right or wrong here because this is America, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. All I am saying is that when it comes to making a decision you have to look at the pros and cons of each possible decision and decide “which decision will do more good then bad” and then you go with that decision because logically it makes sense. In this debate all I saw was a bunch of people desperately defending the idea that medical Marijuana is bad but not one single person could provide any concrete reason for why it is bad... Every time a question was asked of someone who was against medical Marijuana they would defer from it and start ranting on some random statistical number that had nothing to do with the question but instead directly played favor to their “tunnel visioned” argument and/or opinion. 

In my opinion, from a third person perspective, it seemed as though the people who were for the use of medical Marijuana had concrete reasons and facts to support why the use of medical Marijuana was beneficial but their opposers could never provide any reasoning for why they were wrong, they could only state that they were just simply wrong. So which way does the scale seem to be tipping? Well given that the pro medical Marijuana side of the debate had multiple, concrete reasons for how medical Marijuana can help better peopls lives and that the people against the use of medical Marijuana had no concrete reasons for how medical Marijuana would harm society I am going to have to go with the pro medical Marijuana side... Legaling the use of medical marijuana logically make more sense and is the more beneficial choice of the matter. It may not support everyone's moral beliefs but that's not what this is about, this is not about people feelings, it's about people's health.

My Opinion on the Issue

Simply put, medical Marijuana seems to provide just as much help (if not more) as typical prescription medications while causing less side effects and being far less addictive then most medications. So what exactly is the argument against it? There is none really... It's just another taboo subject that people have to riot against because it makes them feel uncomfortable and rather then learning how to deal with their discomfort on the matter they would rather just eliminate it from the picture all together so they can avoid the responsibility of dealing with it.

As far as the politics are concerned I think it's just a matter of time... As soon as pharmaceutical or tobacco company can figure out how to control the market they will push politicians to legalize it with the incentives of tax revenue and it will be legal before you know it. So long as pharmaceutical or tobacco companies can't control the market I believe they will put pressure on politicians to resist legalizing it because as it may increase tax revenue regardless of who is in control of the Marijuana market it will not increase corporate revenue unless the market is under total control... Considering so many politicians are “in bed” with these pharmaceutical and tobacco companies I think it's safe to say politicians will continue to do what they are told by the guys who are secretly paying the bills.

Should Marijuana be legalized? In my opinion, no. Should Medical Marijuana be legalized. In my opinion yes. Marijuana should be legal for medical use, a doctor should be able to prescribe this medication if it is in the best interest of the patient regardless of how Bob, the guy 5 houses down, feels because it is none of Bob's business. Bob doesn't need to know if I am smoking medical Marijuana to relieve pain or popping Vicodin to relieve pain, only my doctor and I need to know because the only person my medication effects is me.

A doctor's job is to maintain a patient's well being not to collect a paycheck. So to hear Dr. Andrea Barthwell state that her biggest fear of medical Marijuana being legalized is that “patients will get medication from street vendors rather then an approved source. It compromises my roll as a physician” kind of ticks me off because it directly supports the feeling that a lot of patients in the MS community feel: Our doctors don't listen, they don't care, they just want our money. She seems to be worried that she won't be able to prescribe as much medication because a patient would be able to purchase their medication elsewhere just like you can purchase cough medicine or OTC pain killers at your local drugstore. So that also reinforces the question: What is the roll of a physician exactly? I was under the impression that it was to help patients but it seems to be the roll of a lot of physicians to help the pharmaceutical companies make money. If you are a physician and you are claiming that it's your roll and goal to help patient live a healthy, fulfilling life, then you should probably support the use of medical Marijuana because it definitely helps people like Montel Williams. Even if you don't personally think it can help a patient what matters is that the patient feels like their medication is working. Sugar pills aren't illegal because they don't actually help people right?

I do think it needs to be harder to get, I think it definitely needs to be better regulated in states like California as nothing ticks me off more then how many people are abusing the medication and getting access to it for every head ache or paper cut they get just because they want to get stoned but that doesn't mean we should make it illegal because we don't want to put a little more effort into the regulation of this medication. If we could better regulate medical Marijuana then maybe we could abandon the image that has grown to stick with the concept of medical Marijuana:  A bunch of stupid kids coming up with dumb excuses to get their medical Marijuana cards so they can get high while listing to Bob Marley.

As Dr. Oz stated at the end of his show, “Medical Marijuana should be use to give people their life back, it should not be use to take people away from life”. 

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Watch the debate on the Dr. Oz Show!

CLICK HERE

To visit his website and watch the clips.

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Progress Update: Feeling the MS Fatigue Again...

About a month or so ago I started tapering off my Prednisone (Oral Steroids). I did not want to have to buy another bottle of pills so I counted how many pills I had and evenly divided them out so I could taper as slowly as possible off what little pills I had left. I thought I had enough to taper down about 5mg a week but I recounted this morning and realized I am way short... I have no idea how I messed it up but now I am having to taper down at about 10mg a week til the last week where I have to drop down another 10mg halfway through the week. Then I will be completely out of Prednisone and hopefully off of it for a while as that is my ultimate goal. If I can stay off the steroids for a while then next time I have a flare up they will probably do me much more good then they do now as my body as no doubtingly built up a tolerance after 7 months of taking such a high dosage.

Now over this last week I had already dropped down about 10mg instead of 5mg (which makes the fact that I am falling short on my pill count even more weird) and already I am feeling the effects of not having as much Prednisone in my system as usual. Headaches are slowly creeping back into my life and worst of all my energy as been dwindling... Once again I am feeling the effects of MS fatigue.... I woke up today feeling like crap: huge headache, no energy, just crappy all around. It's only noon and I just feel like garbage. I do not look forward to the next three weeks as I taper completely off my steroids at a pretty quick rate compared to what I have been doing for the last couple of months.

Hopefully I can stay active enough and eat the right foods to give me the energy I need, the energy I have been for so long getting from my steroids. All I know is I hate feeling like this as any other MS patient does... It's effecting my productivity and my mood... This is going to take some adjusting...

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I Have Multiple Sclerosis, Big Deal!

NOTE: I do not have a medical degree of any sort. The following information is my personal description of the disease as I understand it from what I've been told by doctors and from my own personal research. Please feel free to email me at mattalleng@yahoo.com if you have any questions.

There is absolutely no doubt that being diagnosed and living with Multiple Sclerosis can be extremely difficult both physically and emotionally. MS can cripple your life even stopping it in it's tracks but the tough times will not last if you can adopt the mentality that "Yes, I have Multiple Sclerosis, Big Deal". I truly do believe that having a positive attitude is half the battle as your attitude can directly effect your physical health and of course your actions. If you can look at MS as a mere obstacle that you are sure to overcome then you are much more likely (in my opinion) to concur this disease then if you look at MS as being the end of the world, the end of your life, pure devastation, because the reality of the situation is that it's not.

Again I don't mean to belittle anyone's hardships in any way shape or form nor to I intend to make the impression that once you can adopt this mentality the hard times will be over. No, I only aim to show you that having a positive attitude will make traveling the road of MS much easier and smoother but there will of course always be occasional bumps in the road. Your attitude however is what will determine how you handle those bumps in the road: Will you glide over them, bottom out, blow a tire, or completely brake down? All a matter of attitude.

Of course everyone's situation is different but take me for example: When I was first hit with the disease I was stuck in a wheelchair and slowly loosing my vision. Now I am walking around and of all things taking up photography, possibly even as a career! I have gone on many hikes, trails, camping trips, boat trips, ridden motorcycles, traveled, written a novel, all after I was diagnosed with MS and I owe that to the fact that my pride and stubbornness made me look at this diagnosis as a "so what, big deal" kind of situation. Yes, there were many moment where I broke down but they were only momentarily, I always did my best to quickly get back up on my feet and remember that "Yes, I have Multiple Sclerosis, BIG DEAL", I will overcome this! And so far I always have!

So just remember, MS is not the end of the world. It is not the end of your life. It is not the end of your happiness. MS is nothing more then an obstacle in life that you will surely overcome! You may have MS but MS does not have you! Your not stuck with MS, MS is stuck with you! MS is not a threat to you, YOU are a threat to MS! Drill it into your head, You WILL concur this disease, you will own it, and you will control your life. YOU WILL!

This is ME about 4 months after my Diagnosis.

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Taking Back Your Life

NOTE: I do not have a medical degree of any sort. The following information is my personal description of the disease as I understand it from what I've been told by doctors and from my own personal research. Please feel free to email me at mattalleng@yahoo.com if you have any questions. 

This is probably one of the most important sections of this mini-guide: Taking back your life! MS can come into your life in many different ways, for some people it is a slow process, for others (like me) it can hit you like a truck running a red light at an intersection. In just one month I went from A-OK to half paralyzed, half numb, half blind, unable to walk or stand, and stuck being pushed around in a wheelchair... How ever MS entered your life there is one thing that is certain: MS has taken some part of your life away. It might have taken your ability to walk, to run, to see, to speak, to feel, to think, and more then likely you want that back and you want it back NOW.

Well, unfortunately the healing process can take some time... How long you ask? Well it's different for everyone which is the annoying part... It could take a matter of weeks or months to reach recovery and at the same time there is no guarantee that you will go into a complete state of remission right away... It's all going to depend on the individual and severity of their attack. Either way I believe the process to taking back your life is the same whether your simply dealing with some drop foot or if you completely can't move your legs, some will have to work harder then others to get through their symptoms but we all possess the power to do it!

So how did I go from the horrible state I was in to what I would call "remission"? Honestly I owe a lot of credit to my stubbornness and pride... My doctor told me that it would be useless to try to train myself to walk again or to use my left hand, she said I should just rest. I couldn't do that. I got my fair share of rest, don't get me wrong, but I could not just sit around an do nothing. I did everything I could to get around the house on my own: First I needed a walker to get down the hall, then after a while I started testing the waters as I ventured throughout my house without the support of a walker but instead the support of the walls and furniture around me. My balance was improving and I focused a lot of my efforts on correcting my gate to eliminate my drop foot. Soon I was walking relatively well throughout my house so long as I was continuously aware of myself and my movements.

Still I got lots of rest, I knew I couldn't push myself too hard or else I would just make things worse but I believed the key to recovery was to keep moving and that's exactly what I did, I kept moving. I was soon getting on the treadmill and eventually going for walks. My walking was getting better and better along with my balance and everything else. I was active, eating healthier, and felt great! After a few months I was hanging out with friends again, going out, going on hikes and pushing myself further and further every day. I finally realized that I was now more active then I had been before I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis!

My first MS attack started on August 1st, 2010 and about 3 months later, on October 22,2010, I declared myself to have reached a state of remission! I would say I was about 95% recovered as I still had some slightly fuzzy vision and minor sensitivity to cold on the right side of my body. Other then that I felt like myself again! I had made the decision that I wasn't going to let my life or my youth waste away, I was going to go do things, experience things, see the world inside and out, be productive, and be happy.

I launched my "Campaign of Activity" about a month later by visiting an old friend of mine up in northern California (I live in Southern California). It was an 11 hour trip on both a bus and train, I had just bought myself an SLR camera as I wanted to take up photography and I was taking pictures like mad occasionally taking a brake to work on a novel I had started. I spent a little over a week up there and during that time I went on many walks, took lots of pictures, and even drove to San Francisco where I went on a small cruise under the Golden Gate Bridge and around Alcatraz! I saw a lot up there, it was amazing!

Even after everything I did and saw there is one simple event that has stuck with me pretty vividly. One night my friend Candice and I decided we were going to go for an evening jog around town. At first I was unsure of how I would hold up as I hadn't tried any such exercise since long before my diagnosis. To my surprise I was doing just fine! After a while our pace picked up, I didn't mentally notice it right away but I was enjoying the jog! I used to hate running but this time I was actually enjoying it! Our jog slowly turned into a run and out of nowhere we burst into a sprint through the cold, dark, air. We began to race and all I remember thinking was "There is no way she is faster then me, no way". I left her in the dust, someone who runs almost every day, I left her in the dust and after I stopped to catch my breath I realized: For that brief period of time the fact that I had MS did not cross my mind. It was at that moment that I knew I had taken my life back.

Since then I have relapsed again and am not having the same luck recovering as I did the first time around however, that doesn't matter because what is important is that I gained the mentality that I can still be in control of my life. I gained the knowledge that MS does not own me, I'm not stuck with MS, MS is stuck with me! MS can only rule our lives if we let it and so the secret to taking your life back is all in your head! You have to acknowledge that yes MS is a huge obstacle but it is nothing but an obstacle. Despite the severity of your symptoms you still have the choice as to how you handle your MS obstacle! When MS took the fine motor control away from my left hand rendering me incapable of typing, I didn't just stop writing my novel, I wasn't going to let MS controll my life, so I bought a microphone and started using voice recognition software so I could speak into the mic and let the computer do the typing for me. When my vision faded I simply made the letters on my computer bigger! I was disabled but I was not "unabled", I worked around my obstacles.

Every obstacle MS throws at you can be worked around as long as you acknowledge the fact that it can somehow be worked around. The minute you say you can't is the minute you have let MS win. You can, you can, you can! Drill it in your head, there is always a way, always!


Tough times never last but tough people do!

When it comes to taking your life back all that matters is determining what it is you want to do with your life, what it is you need to be happy, and how your going to make that happen regardless of your symptoms. Know your limits but find a way to accomplish your endeavors even if you have to wait a while to heal some. Learn all you can about this disease! "Know thy enemy". Knowledge will prove to be a deadly weapon against MS and knowledge is free so take advantage of that. Don't stop moving! Use your body how ever you can! Find the right medication regimen for you and the right diet plan so that you can speed up your healing process and hopefully prevent another relapse as bad as your first. Do this and you will once again feel in control! You will take your life back!

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Who Should I tell About My MS?

NOTE: I do not have a medical degree of any sort. The following information is my personal description of the disease as I understand it from what I've been told by doctors and from my own personal research. Please feel free to email me at mattalleng@yahoo.com if you have any questions. 

When I was first diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis I noticed that a lot of other people on online MS forums were asking the question "who should I tell"? It seemed as though people were afraid of what their friends and loved ones would think. Now I didn't go through the typical emotional roller coaster that most newly diagnosed people go through (that's not to say I didn't go on a roller coaster ride of emotions, I just didn't go on the same ride that most everyone else did) but I did know one thing: I needed to give myself some time to come to terms with my diagnosis before I made a decision to tell someone that I had MS because I didn't want to make a decision based on compulsive emotion, I wanted it to be based off of logic, I wanted to be rational.

So before you even start to worry about who you should tell you should worry about whether or not your ready to tell anyone to begin with. Now everyone's situation is different and everyone handles this kind of news differently as well. Some people might need to tell someone right away so they can receive the support they need to get through the initial shock of being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Some people might not need this but for those of you who do I recommend the following.

The First One's to Tell

You just found out that you have MS. If you have been dealing with obvious symptoms for a while and there have been certain people helping you and staying by your side through all your doctors visits leading up to your diagnosis, tell them first. Chances are if they were by your side for the unknown they will be by your side for you now. These are the people who will most likely give you the emotional support you may or may not need. These are the people you want to surround yourself with because they will help you get through the tough times and find balance in your life. If not too many (or no one) knows that you have been having health problems then I would start with who ever you are closest to. Your parents, your significant other, your best friend, etc.

Don't be Afraid to Tell Them

You can't be afraid of what people will think or how they will react because if you can show your own strength by coming forward and explaining what is going on with your health then that will help them be strong for you in return, it will eliminate some of their fear. If they react poorly, they run away, or anything of that sort, then it will be painful for you, it will, I have been through it myself so I know, but it's times like these that allow you to see people's true colors so it's important to keep that in mind if you should have to deal with such a situation. More then likely sharing your MS diagnosis with someone will show you just what kind of person they really are, it will show you how strong they are, how much they care about you, and just how much they are willing to do for you.

Just don't jump to a harsh judgment too fast! Sometimes people's initial reaction will not be the greatest but that's just because they might not know how to handle the shock just like you yourself might not know how to handle the initial shock. Give them time and see how they are after they have had some time to let things soak in. Maybe their initial reaction was poor because they care about you so much and are afraid for you. People deal with fear and hurt in all sorts of different ways. You have to be patient and see how these people adjust because if you immediate shun them from your life out of hurt and anger then you might loose a friend or family member that you didn't have to.

The Second One's to Tell

Now again, everyone's situation is a little different so this exact example may not apply directly to you. At this point you have told a few of your closest loved ones about your diagnosis. Your hopefully a little bit more comfortable with what is going on now so talking about this with a few more people should be a little easier. You might and probably will still feel a little uncomfortable with it all but that's normal in fact, a lot of people never get to a point where they are comfortable talking about their diagnosis but I encourage everyone to be as open as possible because it will ultimately help you, your friends, your family, and other people with MS.

So who do you tell next? I think at this point you should tell your family members and what ever friends you talk to often enough that it's appropriate. One thing I do not recommend is posting a bunch of wall post on facebook announcing to everyone that you have MS. That is not the right way to tell people in my opinion and frankly, you might come off like you are looking for sympathy. Now is a time for strength, a time for you to be as strong as you have ever been, doing such a thing will not support you efforts to keep strong. If your going to tell someone, tell them one on one or at least face to face in a group and don't be afraid to answer people's questions, remember, it's good to be open about this!

Is there Anyone I Shouldn't Tell?

This is a trick question if you ask me... As far as your personal life is concerned there may or may not be people who shouldn't know about this for whatever reasons. That is going to be up to you to determine whether or not that someone needs to know about your diagnosis.

Me personally, I don't hesitate to tell anyone if it comes up. I am not ashamed or embarrassed to have MS in any way shape or form. Why should I be? We don't feel ashamed when we catch a cold or the flu and MS is no different, it's an illness, we didn't ask for MS nor did any choices we made in our lifestyles result in Multiple Sclerosis. Just like the cold or the flu, MS just happend, nothing to be ashamed of, so if it gets brought up somehow I have no problem telling anyone and explaining to them about the disease. Now not everyone is like me, I know I am way more open about my experience then most people but I say all this to hopefully encourage more people to be confident with themselves because no matter what state your in, you are stronger then the average person because you have to deal with all the mess life throws at everyone plus Multiple Sclerosis on top of that.

Now, that said, we move on to Employers... This is where it gets a little tricky. Technically an employer can't fire you or refuse to hire you because of your disability, that would be what we call discrimination.... However, we all know this is not a perfect world and we all know that most people judge a book by it's cover. It's because of this that some people choose not to disclose their diagnosis with their employers but once again this will ultimately be up to you. I can't say that I know the laws regarding this manor inside and out so I suggest you do some research of your own and talk to some people about it before you make any decisions

Dating

I want to end on the matter of dating because this also seems to be a major worry in the world of MS especially among us younger patients. A lot of people worry that they will not be able to find someone do to having MS... I have to admit, I did at first think this myself... How could anyone actually want to spend their life with someone whom they might have to take care of for a good amount of time? Someone who can't keep up with other people our age? Who's life may always be constantly changing? Well this is all foolish thinking, because first of all, you will more then likely get control of your disease and live a very normal life going years without any major issues. Most people won't even notice your disability and it probably won't get in the way of your relationships so don't be afraid of the dating thing. It might be a bit intimidating at first and you might have to wait a while till you get ahold of your life but once things settle you will be back in the game just like before!

Here's the real question though, do you tell your date about your MS? You will get lots of different answers to this online but here is mine: Yes. Telling your date about your disability will show that you have confidence and strength. It will show that it is really no big deal to you because you own your MS rather then your MS owning you. By keeping it a secret you are (in my opinion) letting your MS own you, don't do that, you have MS but MS doesn't have you. Now I wouldn't go announcing that you have MS on your first date, but maybe the second or third (assuming the first went well) go ahead and just casually throw it out there.

If things are going well your date deserves to know what they could be getting into for the long run. If they stick around then you know they really do love you for you and you really do know that they will be the kind of significant other you can depend on to be there for you. If you wait till months or years after a relationship has developed you won't know if they are the kind of person who is going to bail on you when times get tough until... Well.... Times get tough and they bail on you. That is going to hurt a lot worse then not getting a third or fourth date...

My Ending Note

I leave you with this: Don't be afraid of what people will think, as long as they can see that you are confident that's all that will matter. Be open! I know not everyone can be totally open and that is completely fine, but I do in fact encourage you to be as open as you can because it will help everyone around you including yourself. It's always hard to tell the first few people but the more people you tell the easier it get's to tell people so again, don't be afraid, it will be ok!

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Dieting and MS in General

Note: I am not a medical professional, the following information is my opinion based off of my own research and experiences. Always consult with a doctor before making drastic dieting choices.

Dieting can play a huge role in battling Multiple Sclerosis in fact, for some people, a good diet is all they need to beat most their symptoms and prevent further flare ups. But right off the bat I want to mention something I have said many times before: Everyone is different - MS effects everyone differently - Medications effect everyone differently. What works for one person might not work for you. What works for you might not work for someone else.

When I relapsed a second time I really started looking into dieting more closely as at the time I was simply avoiding junk foods and other unhealthy items that no one should really be eating to stay healthy. I wanted to take it to the next level, learn about dieting, and put myself back into remission. At the time all I really knew is that I wanted to avoid foods with high inflamatory properties but I didnt really have a clear idea of what exactly I should be eating and avoiding. So I started looking up specific diets that people with Multiple Sclerosis tend to follow. Here are the main ones:

The Best Bet Diet
The Paleo Diet
The Swank Diet

If you are just starting your quest to find yourself a proper diet this is where you want to start. All three diets are very similar and very popular but they do have some minor differences in opinion of what is "good" or "bad". I went through each diet and created a list of "goods" and "bads" and then created a separate list of "goods" and "bads" that were in all three diets and I chose to eat and avoid those foods for a while.

Here is where the "everyone is different" concept comes into the picture. Though a healthy diet is good for you regardless of your current health condition I have come to the realization that food is not a "trigger" for everyone. A lot of people claim that when they eat certain foods with certain properties they can feel negative effects kick in almost immediately. After doing much "self-testing" and experimenting" it is starting to look like food doesn't really effect me at all. I have been keeping a daily journal of what I eat and what symptoms I experience and looking back I can see that my symptoms havn't really changed at all when comparing a week of strict dieting to a week of Red Robins, steak, and a few sweets. I have tried eating large amounts of everything your not supposed to eat when on these diets and have seen no flare ups in my symptoms and when I am strict about my diet I also see no improvements.

So again, everyone is different and for me dieting does not seem to be the secret to concurring an exacerbation. I am still going to continue eating healthy but I probably am not going to be as strict on certain things like potatoes or gluten. My obvious triggers seem to be limited to heat and stress at the moment: when I am in a hot area or stressfull situaton my symptoms flare up almost immediately which is something I have yet to experiance with food.

So how will you know what works for you? Trial and error. Look at the three diets mentioned above and try them out for a few weeks. See if you feel any different. Do what I did and keep a daily journal of everything you ate and the symptoms you experienced day by day. After a few weeks see if there has been any noticeable changes or patterns in you eating and symptoms. You can also go to the doctors and get a food allergen test done to see if you have any obvious allergies to different foods.

Either way you go, you won't know till you try something and when it comes to dieting it might take you a while to find the right one in fact, you might find that certain aspects of certain diets apply to you and others don't. In the end you will probably end up creating your own, personalized, diet as you slowly learn which foods are good for you and which foods cause you problems.

Trial and Error, Good Luck!

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Progress Update: You Just Can't Measure It

The one thing I CAN measure right now is the amount of time it's been since I have last written a blog post. I have been majorly slacking in my writing... Been kind of busy and my mind has been elsewhere.

Anyways, what I am getting at is it seems to be nearly impossible to measure the progress I am making with my disease. One minute I think I am getting better, next minute I think I am getting worse, then all of a sudden I am feeling better again, then back to crap. It's annoying... Furthermore, my symptoms "progress" are not all in sync. One day my balance will be great but my vision will be poor and the next day my balance will be horrible and my vision will be great. So how can I really say I am getting better or worse? I don't know how to keep track of everything, I wish there was a way I could accurately convert my daily feelings and symptoms into numbers but I have not quite figured out how to  properly do that just yet.

So how have I been doing this week? For the most part pretty good. There have been a few moments where my vision got a little bad but for the most part all my symptoms have been pretty settle. Balance is not to bad, cognitive issues not too, too, bad, Lhermites sign has been absent for most the week except at night when I am getting really tired but even then I can barely feel it in my left hand. Fine motor control is still not 100% but it's not that bad either: My fingers move a little slower, it's hard to do things like keep a cup of water steady while holding it in my left hand, and my coordination is off. My sensativity to the cold has been pretty bad though...

While it seems like most my symptoms are slowly getting better there have been a few little things here and there that have popped up but I guess I do have to remember that I have been on steroids for 7 months and during the last 7 months I have also had THREE Solu-Medrol IV treatments. Now I am almost tapered off my oral steroids and so my body is not getting the extras kick it has probably grown dependent on. I am noticing my fatigue slowly crawling it's way back into the picture... It's hard to deal with fatigue when I need to be productive more then ever right now.

I think ultimately right now is going to be a time for strength and endurance to play a major roll in my life. I have to struggle to get the things I want: I need a job, I need a car, I need lots of things, and so, I need to push through the tough stuff and not let this MS get in the way of my progress, my success for they are two things that simply will not just land in my lap. Everyone has hardships in life to overcome but when there is an entire country on the other side of the world submerged in water and nuclear radiation I don't think I have any room to complain. When there is a country who's own leader is attacking innocent civilians in attempts to maintain control over their freedom I don't think that I have any room to complain. Someone else always has it worse then you do so it's important to focus on the positive things in one's life no matter how small they are because somewhere out there in the world there is someone who would kill to have just a tiny taste of what you have, of what you have grown to take for granted. I have so much opportunity and so much potential, I need to learn to appreciate that more and make something of myself.

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Progress Update: Glasses and Cheesecake

Well this is week 1 of my food allergen experimenting. For the last month I have been relatively strict on my diet with a few exceptions. This week I am introducing potatoes back in, lots and lots of potatoes to see if I have any kind of reaction. As I may have mentioned before, I'm starting to think that food may not really be a trigger for me, mostly stress and heat so we will see.

Yesterday I had a donut and muffin after breakfast, a meatball sub for lunch, and chicken with mashed potatoes and baked beans for dinner. Today I feel just fine. So I had refined sugars, gluten, red meats, potatoes, and legumes, a little bit of everything to start the experimenting out. Small quantities don't seem to have an immediate effect but like I said, this week I will be pushing the large quantities of potatoes and the following week I will try something else. This should be interesting.

Oh almost forgot, today I treated myself to a slice of CHEESECAKE, my absolute favorite! Haven’t had cheese cake since June! It was so, unbelievably good!

Anyways lets move on to how I am doing right now: I mentioned the other day that my vision got pretty bad. Well last night before I went to bed I decided to throw my glasses on just to see what the world looked like through them after not wearing them for a few months. To my surprise everything turned super clear! I didn't even realize how blurry my vision was all this time, it must have slowly been getting worse at a rate so slow that I didn't recognize anything was happening! Hard to believe I got used to seeing things so blurry! So now I am trying to slowly get used to my glasses again because it's been so long since I have worn them that they are giving me a head ache. Now I have to see what using my camera will be like with my glasses haha...

Other then that I have not seen much change in my symptoms, my balance gets better and worse day by day along with my fine motor control and lmites sign. The sensitivity to cold in the right side of my body gets better and worse say the day goes as well. Still have some cognitive issues but they haven’t seemed as bad lately, been playing some strategy games with some of my spare time and I think that's helping stimulate my brain a bit but that could just be a coincidence haha. I have gone on a few walks in the last week or to and I have been noticing some weakness in both my legs and some wacky gate but more in the left then the right. For the most part I am learning how to live with these symptoms pretty well, I am going to start looking for a job now and hopefully if I find one I will be able to handle it ok. I haven’t got any work lately for my photography but I'll be putting my name out in a few different places soon so fingers crossed! I'm so sick of being tight on money but then again, who isn't these days?

Well, I'll be doing some posts on my diet experimentation soon, thanks for reading!

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Progress Update: Extra Flare Up

Yesterday I experienced a bit of a flareup on top of pre-existing symptoms... Towards the end of the day my vision got REALLY bad, almost as bad as when I first started experiencing vision problems. This could have been a result of one of two things... Or both things I don't know... First of all I realized today that  I forgot to take my pills yesterday. I took my Copaxone but forgot to take my steroids and all that good stuff. On top of that class was outside on location and it was kind of warm, not hot, but warm enough for me to brake a bit of a sweat.

I left class in Colton (about 30 minutes from where I live) around 3:30pm and got home just fine. Relaxed a bit and then went to the store with my girlfriend probably around 5 or 6 and it was then, in the middle of shopping, that my vision went out. Just like that: everything got blurry and my blind spot went blind. The best way I can explain this is if I am staring at an object dead on I can see it just fine but everything in the left side of my peripheral vision disappears. The picture below is a really rough example of what it's like, I'll have to redo this example later for a more detailed article on vision.

Lets say I am staring directly at the red pin in the center: the lower image is more or less what I see and the blurry spot gets better and worse as my symptoms flare up and down. Now my photoshop skills only go so far but in reality it's not JUST blurry in that spot but it's more like when you stare at the sun and then look around: for a few seconds you have a weird hazy circle that almost has a hint of green to it in the center. That's what I see only not in the center of my sight but to the left where the blurry spot in the picture is.

Tomorrow I will be back on track with my medication and I also just installed a window A/C unit in my room so I can keep cool as it's slowly starting to warm back up in my part of town. Hopefully tomorrow everything will clear back up. My vision has been ok for the most part today but it is still noticeably off at the moment. It was fine earlier but right now it is a tad fuzzy and my left hand is not working the way I want it to making typing a little tricky. I really can't wait to see that doctor at Loma Linda...

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Progress Update: LOMA LINDA!

Finally! I received my referral to Loma Lina University Medical Center where I will be seeing an actual MS SPECIALIST! I of course am on a waiting list and it could be months before I get in but the paperwork is here and that's what matters! I'm excited to get the opinion and consultation of an actual specialist opposed to a general neurologist who is just following the routine course of treatment. It will be interesting to see whether or not he thinks I am or have been on the right track so far and it will be interesting to see what he has to say of my neurologist's treatment so far along with her lack of interest in anything besides a pill helping my health.

Since it will still be some time before I can see the specialist I am going to be changing my neurologist back at Kaiser because at this point I really couldn't get anyone worse... I just need someone who can monitor me and make sure I'm doing ok, getting the meds I need, etc.

I'm currently trying to get off the Prednisone I have been on for 7 months. I want to see how my body does on virtually NO medication with the exception of my Copaxone injections. I am tapering from 50mg at about 5mg a week right now so by the end of next month I should be done. I'm hoping my health will maintain so I can stay off the steroids for a while and use them when I really need them because right now it seems as though my body has built a bit of a tolerance to them so they are not combating my relapses as powerfully as they did the first time around.

Speaking of relapses, my symptoms aren't doing too bad right now, I just can't really tell what's going on with them. I don't know if they are getting better, worse, or staying the same. For a couple of days the pins and needles went away in my left hand but today I am feeling them faintly return. The fine motor control in that hand had got a bit better as well but got worse as the pins and needles returned. My vision has slightly come and gone over the course of the week but not too bad, just enough to slightly notice. Balance has been going in and out but never back to 100% like my first "remission period", just been getting slightly better but then out of nowhere I will bump into a wall or something... My sensitivity to cold has been pretty bad but that symptom has been consistent throughout my entire MS experience so far. Cognitively I was doing pretty well for a while but yesterday I believe it was, it got pretty bad again. I had also been dealing with some pretty bad insomnia for a few days but the last 2 nights I have slept pretty well so hopefully that was just a random symptom.

Anyways, I am really trying to eat good right now and get lots of rest so hopefully Ill see some changes in the next week or so. I have been keeping a daily journal of all my symptoms and what I have had to eat so I will be reviewing that thoroughly at the end of next week to see if I can notice any changes in relation to my diet. We shall see!

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New Blog Section: PEACE

For those of you (probably everyone) who haven't noticed yet, I JUST added a new section to my Blog. I moved the Q&A to my knowledge base since that wasn't going where I wanted it to and I created a section called "Peace" where I will be sharing all my hobbies and stress relieving activities/projects that help bring me peace alog with a sense of acomplishment.

I'm hoping that by keeping this new journal Ill be able to look back when I am feeling down and remember that I have done a lot and still can do a lot of fun things. In addition I'm hoping others will be able to look at this section as a source of motivation: a place one can understand that MS may be a huge obstacle but it is not an actual wall in life.

Hope you all enjoy! Suggestions are always welcomed!

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Peace: Working on a Garden

So here is the start of one of my many projects I'll be working on: A Garden... Of some sort... Haha I have no idea what I am going to grow yet but I started working with the terrain since the ground is nice and soft from the recent rain. I just have 2 more rows to dig but I'll work on that tomorrow maybe, I am too tired to do any more digging today.

Hopefully I'll be able to eventually brick the steps up the side and fence everything off but yeah it's just something to keep me busy and make myself feel like I created something. Don't have much money anyways haha maybe I can grow some stuff I'll actually EAT! Got to figure out what's in season, I'm sure my dad will know, he is all into that, have to make sure he knows he can do what ever he wants to it as well as I'm sure he would enjoy working on it too.

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